Sunday, 1pm..
my friend came to my house
wake me up from bed..
bring me out..
had lunch together
and she starts the conversation
are you depressed sis ?
I know I've been smiling, but inside I'm dying.
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People are always telling me to smile,
like smiling is going to just take away all the hurt and pain
Well I've tried that
I've tried hiding my sorrows and covering the sadness in smiles and
what I've learned is that when it hurts this much inside your heart always
has a way of showing it
no matter how many layers of make-up you wear
I feel so hopeless and lost
I was just so desperate
I knew what was wrong with me
but nobody else around me understood me
I have lost interest in my studies and everything
I was so depressed and I wish somebody please hit me
And I can just lying on bed forever with empty mind
I needed rest and to be looked after inside my room
and for people to understand the torment and the anguish
going on my head.
I cried like I never cried before and
it was anger, it was eleven years of pent-up anger coming out
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I am living life as it is now by going with the flow
trying to not thinking about 'them' and
adapt with my 'long-distance' love story.
adapt with my 'long-distance' love story.
Sayang, I really need you...
spiritual and secure
I need you to stand besides me
make me feel safe, please!